Wednesday, April 06, 2011

Wednesday Madhouse - Faux Pas.

Hmmm don't know about 'faux pas' but I could win prizes for my ability to insert my foot into my mouth. I could recount endless examples of this talent....but I would rather talk about the how.

Sometimes, if I'm really honest, I am totally aware of what I am saying and I make a vocal gaff to provoke reaction or to piss someone off. I am petty like that. I can garner immense pleasure of saying something that can be taken as an innocent mistake or a deliberate prod. I'm not proud of this (well not always) but it is a part of my make up and I never claimed to be anything other than an arsehole.

However, I do quite often say something that I have no idea could be read the wrong way, normally due to thoughtlessness on my part or my hatred of awkward silences and the overwhelming need I get to fill the gap, which results in a 'blurt out the first thing that pops into my head' moment. Quite often I am so unaware that what I've said could be taken the wrong way, because I've said it in all innocence, and it is not till we get home and M comments or points out how my 'blurt' could be misconstrued that I realise what I've done. This happened this weekend, I had no idea that I might have said something that could be seen as a slight or rude to my SIL but when M told me I was horrified, it hadn't crossed my mind that she could have seen it that way! Hopefully she's known me long enough to realise that along with sometimes being an arsehole I balance it with being an idiot. Whatever though, it will be a case of least said soonest mended.

Perhaps I should just learn two skills to solve these aspects of my flawed character - 1) learn to let opportunities pass and be a nicer person and 2) learn to let others fill the silence or to let the silence flow and be comfortable with the awkwardness.

p.s I think some peeps take my posts to heart - a lot of what I type is tongue in cheek and I love to take the piss out of myself within my blog writing. Also I quite often get stumped with the Madhouse topics and type a load of ole bollocks just to make a post because my OCD will not let me miss one!

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